By Trent Rosser
The other day my wife and I was talking about the weather. She looked at me and said, “It looks like it would be a slobberknocker.” Yes, she said slobberknocker. It got me to think about some of the words that we no longer use. Now, personally, I still use some of these words. I am sure I have called a couple of young kids “Whippersnappers” and I still tell my wife that I am going to the store to get a can of “soda water”. I learned these words and others from my grandparents. Some of them still make sense to some of us. But only because we have heard them before.
Remember being younger and staying up all night listening to the radio? Grandma would come in and say, “turn off that damn squawk box”. Yep, that is what she called a radio. I learned a lot of strange words that older people used. Now a day if I say something like one of those strange words, people would think I had lost my mind. Can you imagine if you went to ask a girl on a date and asked “Hey Baby, I got a Washington, won’t you join me at the picture show tomorrow night after I play for pinks. Hey, I might even have a new jalopy.” Translation, “I got a little bit of money and would like to take you out to the movies after I drag race someone for their car.” Yes, some of these words were very strange. Everyday things could be very complicated. Grandma would get up very early in the morning just to start the Perculator and her and grandpa would start the day by drinking a cup of joe before heading our yonder to work. In other words, start the coffee pot, then drink a cup of coffee, before going to work. Honestly, I am 48 years old and I still have not found “Yonder” Where the hell is “Yonder”?
Now I know my grandmother cussed sometimes, but it was not often at all. I can’t remember when she actually said a cuss word, but I do remember hearing her say on many occasions, “Oh Fiddlesticks!” That is usually when something bad happened like if she burned something on the stove or forgot to get something at the store. Here is another one with an actual cuss word. “Poop fire and save the matches” only the word was not poop! That I mainly heard from my mother and not my grandparents as much. Don’t get me wrong, my grandparents did cuss every now and then. When they did cuss, you better hit the door because something bad happened and you would not want to be around in case it was you that caused it. But then again, most of the time, I did cause it. Up until I was 12 years old, I thought my real name was “Damn it Trent!” Even my brother had a name like that too, His name was “Oh Hell, Justin!” I am sure some of you had names like that also.
Another word that sounds like it could be an early cuss word, would be the old saying for a television. Here is something I remember my grandparents saying “Hand me the T.V. Guide so I can see which of my stories will be on the boob tube.” Translation: “I need the T.V. Guide to see what show is coming on the T.V.” Can you imagine telling a 10 year old “Turn that dang boob tube down! You’re going to end up with hearing aids!” Poor kid would probably think he was caught looking at the bra section of the old Sears and Roebuck catalog!
Even clothes had different words. What you would call slacks, or jeans were once called britches. I know that my grandparents were not the only one that would say, “Take off those corduroy britches so I can sew a couple of patches in the knee. Unfortunately, I remember some of these so called patches in the britches. They were not flattering in the 70’s and they would definitely not be flattering now! I will say this though, one of my grandmothers had some of the ugliest britches. Neon pink, neon green, bright red, bright yellow. She was only about 4 feet 10 inches, but with her britches you could definitely find her in a crowd! She took all these britches and cut them, then like she did with patching our britches, she made a couple of quilts for my brother and myself; one of the best quilts I ever owned.
Boob tube means TV and icebox means refrigerator. Washington meant money. They seem funny now, but to our older generation, that is the way they talked. I am sure that when I get older and I am talking to my grandson and telling him about me growing up, he will wonder what a “Hair band” is. Or what in the world is a “dude” and what does “Awesome” mean. One this is for sure though, I will let his grandmother explain the whole “duck face” craze!! And, when he starts to bugging me and getting on my nerves, I will tell him “I’m busy, go out yonder.” Who knows, maybe he’ll find it?
Rosser/Provided